noodsletter #.0033
The flotsam that was promised
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Again, switched things up this week because of the backlog, this is just “news.” Hoping to get back on schedule in future installments with a mix of everything under one noodsletter roof, as it were.
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Book Bit
A Chinese of extreme emaciation came into the room. He seemed to take up no room at all: he was like the piece of grease-proof paper that divides the biscuits in a tin. The only thickness he had was in his striped flannel pyjamas. ‘Monsieur Chou?’ I asked.
From The Quiet American by Graham Greene.
“News”
A liiiiitle skeptical of the “more people are doing this thing” and “after the pandemic” framing of this trend piece/article about people doing classes where they hunt and forage and butcher animals (ok, a lot).
Incredible that we have supercomputers at our fingertips and sci-fi level instant communication technology and we use them to spread conspiracy theories about Katy Perry and apple cider vinegar concentration.
THIS is what the internet is for: Data analysis of the price of NYC slices from 2014 to present.
A review of the restaurant where University of Michigan coach Jim Harbaugh sullied his reputation by buying a couple of hamburgers and waffle fries.
So, figs are incredible, fascinating, etc. But I don’t like them?!
Man, I would love to grow potatoes!
An Italian Nobel-winning physicist suggested people save on energy by shutting off the heat on boiling pasta water and letting the pasta cook with the latent energy, which of course caused controversy. Some students did their own testing on the question, but my question is why is the focus on cooking proteins, rather than starch gelatinization?
Never read Charles Simic (RIP). Here’s a little from a F&W piece about sausages:
Supposedly a Neapolitan guy in Oakland who didn't speak a word of English made them from an old family recipe. I never believed this entirely, but such stories seem to be obligatory among cooks. There's always someone in a small grocery store or a luncheonette in some outlying suburb or inner-city ghetto who sells the best sausage you ever tasted.
Reminds me of the Nero Wolfe mystery Too Many Cooks, which of course is available in toto online:
"Yes. I was only a youngster, but even so, I was in Spain on a confidential mission for the Austrian government. The track of a man led me to Figueras, and at ten o'clock one evening, having missed my dinner, I entered a little inn at a corner of the plaza and requested food. The woman said there was not much, and brought me wine of the house, bread, and a dish of sausages."
Wolfe leaned forward. "Sir, Lucullus never tasted sausage like that. Nor Brillat-Savarin. Nor did Vatel or Escoffier ever make any. I asked the woman where she got it. She said her son made it. I begged for the privilege of meeting him. She said he was not at home. I asked for the recipe. She said no one knew it but her son. I asked his name. She said Jerome Berin. I ate three more dishes of it, and made an appointment to meet the son at the inn the next morning. An hour later my quarry made a dash for Port-Vendres, where he took a boat for Algiers, and I had to follow him. The chase took me eventually to Cairo, and other duties prevented me from visiting Spain again before the war started." Wolfe leaned back and sighed. "I can still close my eyes and taste that sausage."
An enterprising Nero Wolfe fan actually tried to make the sausage (it’s incredibly involved, and uses a bunch of expensive meats).
Gwen Stefani is Japanese, man. (She’s not Japanese, man.) I suppose you shouldn’t laugh at stuff that people are upset about, but this whole thing is funny to me.
RIP new Gawker. I really enjoyed it!
Speaking of, I was going to criticize this Ryan Sutton review of the newly opened ramen shop in Dumbo, but then he got laid off, which stinks. Media really went through it since I sent out the noodsletter in January.
I also went to that ramen shop, and it was all right, but wildly expensive.
Sietsema survived the culling:
But I found the New England clam chowder holds its own, with a calm demeanor that recalls a placid upstate lake, a whiteness that almost requires sunglasses, and a subtle refined flavor in which the bitterness of clams is defeated by dairy, resulting in a dish as soothing as 45 minutes with your therapist.
I wish I could read this Atlantic article about the design of pizza delivery boxes, but I don’t have a sub!!!
This photo is so funny, like AI did it with a “All-Clad skillet with normal vegetables” prompt:
Hing/asafoetida is such a crazy ingredient, but I did not know a) that it’s mostly manufactured in Iran (even though Iranians don’t really use it!) and b) it’s a key ingredient in Worcestershire sauce. Although calling it “divisive” is odd?
I have never eaten pastina (and never will?).
More on pastina and why it was discontinued, and the probability it has to do with machine parts scarcity.
One of the things I forget about Ruhlman is that he was the original compulsive over-sharer of the big Internet 2.0 cookery names.
A meal at George Santos’s favorite restaurant.
On Katherine “Mansfield's persistently alimentary mode of thought.” Very interesting!
“Restaurant workers pay to fund lobbying group that works to keep restaurant workers from being paid fairly” is so insane and, yup, America.
Fascinating piece on diabetes in Sardinia, a land filled with food that will kill diabetics.
This article about whether or not stock is “overhyped” has the most nonsensical quotation from Andy Baraghani. “Whether it’s a nuoc cham or a braise, adding stock adds weight—unnecessary weight—and I kind of want the freshness and that clean water to allow the other ingredients to come through and breathe.”
Imagine if this writer had not turned this article about what’s in store-bought stock into a memoir about reporting an article about what’s in store-bought stock. It might have been interesting.
Chocolate tastes good because of emulsions—it’s just texture!
As a person who used to drink quite a lot and now drinks barely at all, feel like any amount of time not drinking is good in myriad ways, regardless of whether you do a whole month or not.
Restaurants are sick of ur TikTok ish, Gen-Z.
If you want to be hot like a medieval beauty, eat sweets, get a belly.
If the desire for women to be both “amply fleshed” and “svelte” seems like a contradiction, it is resolved as the theoretical eyes of the writer and reader scan downward. From the waist they light on, per Matthew, “the luscious little belly.” Modern readers might think that this is a reference to a flat belly to match the small waist. Instead, Matthew and his cohort were speaking of their delight in a pot belly, which “rises” outward, hearkening back to Machaut’s reference to his beauty being “amply fleshed.” Elsewhere the same preference for a belly is referred to as a softness or a swelling. When poets made no specific reference to bellies, they often expounded on the long torsos of the beauties that inhabited their minds. One way or another, medieval writers were emphatic that they in no way favored women skipping lunch.
I don’t actually understand what all the replies and quote tweets are referring to, but it’s pretty hilarious:
Very cool Lunar New Year food explainer (happy new year to all who celebrate!)
Pamela Paul has gotta be the worst NYT Op-Ed columnist I’ve ever read, and I was reading the Op-Eds when Bill Kristol was doing whatever he thought he was doing. Is vegetarianism woke? Can you imagine having a column in the New York Times and deciding to write about this topic, and then doing it so badly?
Writers and their food tattoos.
Fish head pie sounds…amazing.
Headlines that make you go hmmm: “People Think This “Trad Life” Carnivore Influencer Is Secretly A Woman. He Isn’t.”
Body Positivity FTW! This Flounder Doesn’t Give Two Shits That Its Body Is All Flat And Weird And Sideways And Shit
My old employer laid off 7% of its workforce, so they can remain financially viable and produce deathless pieces of internet content like this: “This Reddit User Seasoned Their Cast Iron Pan 80 Times ‘for Science’—Now We’re Eyeing This On-Sale Lodge Snag a skillet while it’s over 40% off at Amazon.”
Micro algae is the future of food? Why the heck not.
“The Waffle House Brawl Belongs in a Museum”
OMG NOMA IS GONNA CLOSE IN TWO YEARS WAIT WHAT WHY IS THAT 2 YEARS THAT’S A LONG TIME BUT THEY WANT PRESS FOR THEIR MUSHROOM SHOYU EXCUSE ME SOY SAUCE EXCUSE ME “GARUM” PRODUCTS OK LET’S RUN WITH IT
Gotta respect the hustle. I’m going to just grade the coverage using letter grades, like this is elementary school.
NYT article that kicked off the fuss: A
Pete Wells on the fuss: B+ (a little biased, I like his writing, assignment here kind of sucked)
NYMag article about the fuss: C
NYMag roundtable about the fuss: B-
Eater article about the fuss: B+
Food and Wine about the fuss: D-
This is how the best restaurants in the world list got started!
“Why are all restaurant guides awful?” somebody said.
“How difficult can it be?”
“Why don’t we do our own?”
“I know, let’s do one for the entire world!”
Continuing with the letter grades, Tammie Teclemariam gets an A+ at her new gig.
And her successor gets a D. Hot pot? Zzzzzzz. His first installment wasn’t even about food, so I suppose that’s some improvement.
If I could give Dennis Lee an A+++++++, I would, and I can, so I have! A++++++++++++++++++++ (he eats a whole truffle).